By Carlos Randolphsen
Pirates were surprised to be beaten back by heavily armed trophy girls of the Washougal Forces Organization (WFO) after a fierce battle approximately 12 nautical feet off the coast of Treasure Island.

The Trophy Girls, with the help of Navy Crank Seals, successfully repelled the invaders. Their superior firepower included Husky 390 pipes (seen above) and unweildy Monark GS cylinders. The Bucaneers, unaware of the difference between powder-puff with powder-coat got waxed, Police said.

But William Grubinson said a nonprofit group that monitors pirate activity reports that this threat is on the rise. The increasing scarcity of YZ boots, CR kick-arms, and indeed unobtanium in general, has cause Pirate attacks to skyrocket over the past decade.

In a controversial move, area grocery stores have quit stocking fruit in an effort to encourage scurvy in Pirate Crews, but a local school district spokeswoman said the children have to come first, and it is better to have Vintage Parts fall into the hands of Swashbucklers than for kids to go hungry.

Thom Green was quoted as saying he was outraged by this lack of focus putting brats ahead of parts. "Pirates anchored in the E-Bay can sell with abandon, along with everyone else" he said. "The only way we can track them is to watch for parrots among the pistons and other parts...."

Vintage Racers everywhere have asked that this issue be brought to the fore at the upcoming B8-ES Summit.


©2009 SIEGE